Eric Gets Pithy

Every so often, someone asks a question and I just can't help myself. The dry sense of humor returns, and I start typing away. Some of these incidents are even worth saving Here are a few, in some cases presented with the questions which triggered them.

*WHAT EXACTLY* is wrong with Netscape?

That depends. Netscape 6 is a very nice Formula-One level engine trapped in a 18-wheeler. The engine's raw performance is great, but you can't really tell due to the massive body weight it has to carry around.

Netscape 4.x, on the other hand, has a rendering engine which was implemented as a huge switch diagram. Imagine a trainyard bigger than North America. Got it? Okay, it's more complicated than that. And if any one switch goes the wrong way, then everything after that is going to go wacko. If, as is more often the case, several switches go the wrong way-- or, even worse, the switches are all locally correct, but interact badly at a global level-- then you end up with huge, massive train wrecks which kill hundreds and spill toxic waste all over the ground, throwing up plumes of choking, acrid smoke which induce vomiting and bring tears to the eyes of everyone within miles.

All in all, not a bad description of Netscape's rendering results, really.

(macromedia.dreamweaver; 5 January 2001)